Ian WhiteDudanese Entry 3:
December 14th 2010 22:11
Category: No Category
A close female friend of mine requested this topic for today to clear up some understandable confusion. Yes us guys can be complicated at times for some of the same reasons women are; we don't understand each other. In this particular instance it is about expectations. This problem arises when a woman hears any variation of the following:
"I'm with her but we're not together"
"We're just talking"
"We're not putting a label on it"
"It's casual"
In all of the above scenarios, you can be 150% sure that sex was involved. The difference between men and women is that men can separate emotions from sex. We see sex like we see a sandwich. We're hungry/horny, thus want to satisfy that hunger/horniness by eating/getting laid. If we find the sandwich/sex particularly enjoyable, then we'll make/request it again once we are hungry/horny. Women tend to see sex as forming a deeper connection with another person, letting themselves go in the ultimate display of trust. Hence, once you both have sex, the man expects to be left alone (sandwich first) and eventually receive more sex once ready. The woman expects that they're going to be getting closer to a relationship. (Assuming the sex wasn't awful) The phrases I mentioned before come up when there has been ongoing sexual encounters. To a typical guy, consistent sex with a woman means, consistent sex with a woman. If pressed you get a "I'm with her but we're not together," because while he is with her (naked) the man has not made a commitment to only be with her and assumes she agrees. The woman assumes there is something special going on otherwise they wouldn't be annually sleeping with each other.
Remember class, assumptions kill. Communication is always best.
It is important to note a guy in this situation may not always be a commitment-phobe. The fact of the matter could be, he's just not that into you. (Sorry) If the guy was blown away by you, he'd bring a relationship up himself. Him not doing this could mean one of two things.
1. He likes you as a breathing pleasure hole, not a girlfriend
2. He's at the moment juggling multiple "we're just casual's" and you haven't made your case yet.
You don't want to be in this situation ladies, so it's best that both of you make the expectations, if any, known to each other before jumping in the sack. It'll save a lot of heartache and busted windows.
"I'm with her but we're not together"
"We're just talking"
"We're not putting a label on it"
"It's casual"
In all of the above scenarios, you can be 150% sure that sex was involved. The difference between men and women is that men can separate emotions from sex. We see sex like we see a sandwich. We're hungry/horny, thus want to satisfy that hunger/horniness by eating/getting laid. If we find the sandwich/sex particularly enjoyable, then we'll make/request it again once we are hungry/horny. Women tend to see sex as forming a deeper connection with another person, letting themselves go in the ultimate display of trust. Hence, once you both have sex, the man expects to be left alone (sandwich first) and eventually receive more sex once ready. The woman expects that they're going to be getting closer to a relationship. (Assuming the sex wasn't awful) The phrases I mentioned before come up when there has been ongoing sexual encounters. To a typical guy, consistent sex with a woman means, consistent sex with a woman. If pressed you get a "I'm with her but we're not together," because while he is with her (naked) the man has not made a commitment to only be with her and assumes she agrees. The woman assumes there is something special going on otherwise they wouldn't be annually sleeping with each other.
Remember class, assumptions kill. Communication is always best.
It is important to note a guy in this situation may not always be a commitment-phobe. The fact of the matter could be, he's just not that into you. (Sorry) If the guy was blown away by you, he'd bring a relationship up himself. Him not doing this could mean one of two things.
1. He likes you as a breathing pleasure hole, not a girlfriend
2. He's at the moment juggling multiple "we're just casual's" and you haven't made your case yet.
You don't want to be in this situation ladies, so it's best that both of you make the expectations, if any, known to each other before jumping in the sack. It'll save a lot of heartache and busted windows.
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