Ian WhiteHow to be what Women want
March 24th 2008 00:58
This is the first in a series of blogs where I will be answering the question that Fraud tried his whole career to answer and failed. What do women want? I encourage the readers to add comments leaving your questions whether it be about a problem with your current relationship, how to get a relationship, personal development, whatever is plaguing your social life. Men and women are welcome to share their thoughts and ask for my perspective. I will take the time during the week to address in a separate post as many of your questions as I can and will probably answer more in the blogs themselves. I guess I should note that I do not have (nor do I need) a degree in this stuff. I have the benefit of my personal success and different experiences as well as a lot of reading. You do not have to take my advice as law, I'm just putting it out there to give you a unique point of view. So without further ado, Part 1 of How to be what Women want:
So what DO women want? If I had a dollar for every time a frustrated guy has said this, I'd be Bill Gates. Well the first thing I would say to a person asking this is that they already have the wrong idea here. That question is far too vague. Why do you want to know what women want? What specific want do you wish to learn? For what purpose will this answer serve? How important is it? Well as this is a dating blog, I'll narrow down the question. What do women want in a man? See? Much better. The answer is simple however....They want YOU. That's right, a woman wants YOU, a MAN. Confused? Of course you are. I'll elaborate. A woman doesn't want YOU as in the mamma's boy with no backbone. A woman wants the MAN that poor conditioning or traumatic events have hidden from her view. Not to worry, each week I will be giving you a vital key to having the success with the woman that you want and giving a woman the man she deserves.
The Step before the First:
Before you can have ANY success with a woman (or in life), you must first have a purpose. Do you want marriage? A girlfriend? A one night stand? A casual relationship? How you act in the relationship depends on this. If you want a casual relationship, it wouldn't make sense to see her all the time and/ or say you love her. That's how feelings get hurt and tires get slashed.
Know who you are and what you want. Do you want to be a pick up artist or are you just looking for one meaningful person? You must decide.
Misconception 1: You cannot argue a person into liking you
Sorry, fellas but if she doesn't want you, saying things like "But i'm a great guy, we'd be perfect for each other, I love you" will not only result in you going home alone, but she just might change numbers or serve you with paper work if you get too persistent. Attraction to another human being is not something you can turn on and off. A man can't say "Okay, I no longer find Beyonce attractive" and the next second no longer be attracted to Beyonce unless she morphs into a Demon or something. (Even then, you'll think her old form is still hot) Attraction is a subconscious reaction. However, the good news is that YOU CAN do things to spark and amplify it. You just have to know your target and learn the skills. You see men are turned on by the visual. We see a pretty face, thin waste, thick lips, nice hips, and are ready to go. Marlyin Monroe knew this and did things to her appearance to increase her appeal to men and SPARK and AMPLIFY the attraction they felt for her. She wasn't normally that extraodinary. She would actually walk around without makeup and without trying to be special and people would not notice her. Women are different. They can be turned on by the visual but they respond more to the other senses. Women love smells, touch, taste, and the right verbal communication. It's not about what you say as much as it is how you say it. Master these things and you'll be well on your way.
Misconception 2: There is no love at first sight
I think this is a very important thing to get past. This is a concept that is hindering a lot of people because they think that they can just stroll through life and one day somebody will see them on the street and want to marry them. THIS WILL NEVER HAPPEN. Romantic love occurs when you meet and know a person who you can see yourself in and who makes your flaws feel like your strengths. It has to come from bonding with them. Do not confuse Love with Lust, though it's a common mistake.
Misconception 3: Men and Women are different
I mentioned earlier the difference in attraction. Men and Women are on different wave lengths. This however ruins a lot of relationships because Men expect women to love all the high adrenaline, rough stuff that they like and women expect men to enjoy all the fluffy, emotional stuff that they enjoy. Stop it. You are fighting a losing battle. If you show a man a picture of a bikini model, he'll tell you she's hot and can tell you how nice her rack is. You show a woman the same picture, she'll tell you the style of outfit, what she thinks of the makeup and hair, how her complexion looks, and how well her nails are. A man reads ESPN the magazine, a woman reads Cosmo. Do not expect your significant other to love all the same things you do. It is not scientifically possible for ANYONE to like all the same things, and is even more unlikely for two people with even fewer naturally similar tendencies.
Misconception 4: Nice Guys don't Finish Last
This is just for those that still doubt this. It's fiction. Sorry. You'll learn why in great detail in future blogs. But the good news is, you don't have to be a pill popping, Harley driving, wife beater to get girls.
Misconception 5: It's Okay to be You
You will not have to completely be another person to have success. Its all about improvement. You are gaining new skills. When you learned Math you weren't afraid of not being true to you, it was necessary and you were the same person after learning 2 2. It's the same with social skills. You will still be you, just with more skills.
Misconception 6: If you're Rich your Girl problems are over
Money can get you laid, it can't get you anything of merit when it comes to women. If you have money, fame, whatever and suck with women you'll just have failure with relationships. Paul McCartney just lost 48 million dollars from divorce. Donald Trump runs through wives like Bill Clinton runs through interns. Money don't matter, you still need the skills.
That'll wrap it up for now. Stay tuned though and send in those comments. If I get them I will answer questions on Thursday. On Friday I will post the next installment of this blog. It will be step 1 in your success with women and is the most important thing you will learn. It is absolutely vital to master this and pointless to continue without it. It is the most important thing to have in your arsenal, and I'll tell you all about it.
Love life and be at peace
So what DO women want? If I had a dollar for every time a frustrated guy has said this, I'd be Bill Gates. Well the first thing I would say to a person asking this is that they already have the wrong idea here. That question is far too vague. Why do you want to know what women want? What specific want do you wish to learn? For what purpose will this answer serve? How important is it? Well as this is a dating blog, I'll narrow down the question. What do women want in a man? See? Much better. The answer is simple however....They want YOU. That's right, a woman wants YOU, a MAN. Confused? Of course you are. I'll elaborate. A woman doesn't want YOU as in the mamma's boy with no backbone. A woman wants the MAN that poor conditioning or traumatic events have hidden from her view. Not to worry, each week I will be giving you a vital key to having the success with the woman that you want and giving a woman the man she deserves.
The Step before the First:
Before you can have ANY success with a woman (or in life), you must first have a purpose. Do you want marriage? A girlfriend? A one night stand? A casual relationship? How you act in the relationship depends on this. If you want a casual relationship, it wouldn't make sense to see her all the time and/ or say you love her. That's how feelings get hurt and tires get slashed.
Know who you are and what you want. Do you want to be a pick up artist or are you just looking for one meaningful person? You must decide.
Misconception 1: You cannot argue a person into liking you
Sorry, fellas but if she doesn't want you, saying things like "But i'm a great guy, we'd be perfect for each other, I love you" will not only result in you going home alone, but she just might change numbers or serve you with paper work if you get too persistent. Attraction to another human being is not something you can turn on and off. A man can't say "Okay, I no longer find Beyonce attractive" and the next second no longer be attracted to Beyonce unless she morphs into a Demon or something. (Even then, you'll think her old form is still hot) Attraction is a subconscious reaction. However, the good news is that YOU CAN do things to spark and amplify it. You just have to know your target and learn the skills. You see men are turned on by the visual. We see a pretty face, thin waste, thick lips, nice hips, and are ready to go. Marlyin Monroe knew this and did things to her appearance to increase her appeal to men and SPARK and AMPLIFY the attraction they felt for her. She wasn't normally that extraodinary. She would actually walk around without makeup and without trying to be special and people would not notice her. Women are different. They can be turned on by the visual but they respond more to the other senses. Women love smells, touch, taste, and the right verbal communication. It's not about what you say as much as it is how you say it. Master these things and you'll be well on your way.
Misconception 2: There is no love at first sight
I think this is a very important thing to get past. This is a concept that is hindering a lot of people because they think that they can just stroll through life and one day somebody will see them on the street and want to marry them. THIS WILL NEVER HAPPEN. Romantic love occurs when you meet and know a person who you can see yourself in and who makes your flaws feel like your strengths. It has to come from bonding with them. Do not confuse Love with Lust, though it's a common mistake.
Misconception 3: Men and Women are different
I mentioned earlier the difference in attraction. Men and Women are on different wave lengths. This however ruins a lot of relationships because Men expect women to love all the high adrenaline, rough stuff that they like and women expect men to enjoy all the fluffy, emotional stuff that they enjoy. Stop it. You are fighting a losing battle. If you show a man a picture of a bikini model, he'll tell you she's hot and can tell you how nice her rack is. You show a woman the same picture, she'll tell you the style of outfit, what she thinks of the makeup and hair, how her complexion looks, and how well her nails are. A man reads ESPN the magazine, a woman reads Cosmo. Do not expect your significant other to love all the same things you do. It is not scientifically possible for ANYONE to like all the same things, and is even more unlikely for two people with even fewer naturally similar tendencies.
Misconception 4: Nice Guys don't Finish Last
This is just for those that still doubt this. It's fiction. Sorry. You'll learn why in great detail in future blogs. But the good news is, you don't have to be a pill popping, Harley driving, wife beater to get girls.
Misconception 5: It's Okay to be You
You will not have to completely be another person to have success. Its all about improvement. You are gaining new skills. When you learned Math you weren't afraid of not being true to you, it was necessary and you were the same person after learning 2 2. It's the same with social skills. You will still be you, just with more skills.
Misconception 6: If you're Rich your Girl problems are over
Money can get you laid, it can't get you anything of merit when it comes to women. If you have money, fame, whatever and suck with women you'll just have failure with relationships. Paul McCartney just lost 48 million dollars from divorce. Donald Trump runs through wives like Bill Clinton runs through interns. Money don't matter, you still need the skills.
That'll wrap it up for now. Stay tuned though and send in those comments. If I get them I will answer questions on Thursday. On Friday I will post the next installment of this blog. It will be step 1 in your success with women and is the most important thing you will learn. It is absolutely vital to master this and pointless to continue without it. It is the most important thing to have in your arsenal, and I'll tell you all about it.
Love life and be at peace
| 100 |
| Vote |
Subscribe to this blog
Comment by Harry
Sydney Diary
Personals
Brisbane Diarystar
Zoo Parent
So so true. How did you become so expert
Comment by jon
Orble News
Urban Hint
Blog Adviser
Jon's Bookmarks
Debate Battle
Orblepedia
Orble Notes
Sydney WeekendNotes
You may also need to add the email address admin -at- orblemail.com to your address book in order to receive Orble admin emails in the future.
Thanks,
Jon.
(Guy who runs Orble with Charles)
Comment by Ian White
Single Bloke
Comment by Dumb Bloke
I'll continue to read with interest, but I dispute your ability to understand 'what women want', it's impossible!